The “change” process entails various stages, one of them being “regression” – I prefer to use the words “slowing down of the momentum”. It's often at this stage when you're trying to implement change in your life, that you suddenly hit a wall.
No matter how hard you try, you just don’t seem to be able to move beyond “go” anymore and it's at this stage that you may experience frustrations, blaming defeat, and even anger. Sound familiar?
Being stuck isn't an easy place to be. You can't see any way forward and you certainly don't want to go backward. So what are the choices here? How often do you then get told to simply let go? Have faith and let go. Yet, is it really that simple? How liberating it sounds and yet so frightening at the same time
"You don't always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens" - Mandy Hale
Read on to explore the process of letting go, what happens when you get stuck, and the six benefits to let IT go.
The Letting Go Process
When you decide to make a change from something that's not working in your life, you often start with feelings of excitement, positivity, and relief that there is actually hope out there. At last, there's some movement and you're finding ways to take action.
You draw up goals, design vision boards, and dream about how your future is going to pan out. Most often your dreams are so much better than where you are right now (obviously or else why would you be working on changing your life or certain aspects of it?).
You may decide to work with a life coach (good starting point!) and together with your life coach, you come up with an actionable plan. You work through the action steps, bringing you closer and closer to the change you're implementing.
The letting go process begins. You do this by tackling your limiting beliefs and replacing them with empowering beliefs. You unpack your values system, pulling it apart and then putting it back together again as you realize which values are truly yours and not someone else’s.
You study the rules you put in place so that you may experience your values as often as possible. You also discover how your human needs can violate your values if you're not careful about ensuring that all your basic needs are met and kept in balance.
You fulfill your action steps daily, bringing you closer to each milestone, which in turn brings you closer to your goal.
What Happens When You Get Stuck?
All of sudden, something happens or actually, it doesn’t happen. You find yourself stuck. Suddenly, the momentum slows down and the goal, the dream, the change you were chasing to implement seems far away, almost impossible to achieve. Now what?
This “slowing down of the momentum” happens for a reason. At the time, you may curse and swear, finding yourself in a state of despair because what seemed like such a good idea some time back and still seems like a good idea now, just doesn’t want to happen.
You sit down with your life coach and look at the reasons for this blip on your journey of change – someone once described it as “Just a small piece of gravel getting in the way of a million-mile long journey.”
You try to identify any fears that are still holding you back. You wonder if perhaps you're just procrastinating (another word for a fear-based belief!) or maybe even, you start to blame or justify why things are not happening the way you want them to happen.
You're stuck, you're frustrated, and you feel let down.
And, then someone says – "Let go, just let go."
When you're stuck, your vision narrows. Your perspectives go astray, you get lost in the small picture instead of looking at the bigger picture. My father would say, "You can't see the wood for the trees" when you get stuck. That's a dangerous place to be if you don't recognize it's happening.
It's at this stage where you can decide to beat yourself up and take up bad habits again. Or, you can decide to identify what is holding you back so you can let it go. And, then release the blocked energies so you can get back to maintaining action.
What Are the Benefits of Letting Go?
Letting go allows you to grow. it gets you out of your stuckness so you can move on forward with your journey of change. Here are some other benefits of letting go and releasing IT.
1. You Live in the Moment
When you live in the moment, you start dropping the past and don't dwell on the future. You're simply living in the moment. So often when you clinging to the past or focusing on your future too much, you miss out on so many special little moments that are happening to you right now, right this moment.
Letting go lets you live in the moment and the power of NOW gives you the momentum you need to get out of a place of being stuck.
2. You Get to Take a Breather
You can get so caught up in your pursuit for change that you lose touch with your life as it is. Perhaps there’s a partner that needs attention or a child that wants you to play a game with. Maybe there are signs of ill-health that you've been ignoring and need to be attended to. Maybe you just need to take a deep breath and slow down.
In the moment of letting go you free up space to breathe again (and smell the roses as the famous saying goes!). You get to see what's really going on around you when you start breathing again.
3. You Think More Calmly and Rationally
Most times, when things aren't going well, your mind gets caught up in a total jumble! By letting go you're saying to your mind “Relax, it’s going to be fine. Breathe”. Letting go means you're releasing stagnant energies that are cluttering up your mind, unnecessarily.
When your mind is free of all the clutter, you can start to see things with more rationale and clarity. That's the power of letting go!
4. You Drop Your Expectations
How many times do you put high expectations on how the change must take place? You set the outcome and cast it in stone. You're not prepared to let any other outcome happen. What you have not factored in is that life happens, plans change, people behave differently from how you thought they would.
At the same time, having certain expectations often means you miss out on other opportunities that may give you the result you're looking for, just in a different way to what you were expecting. Let go and trust the process.
5. You Let the Energy Flow
One of the principles of shamanism and life coaching is "Where attention goes, energy flows." Imagine what's happening when all the attention is on “I am stuck, I am stuck, I am stuck!!!”. When energy isn't flowing freely nothing works.
Letting go takes your attention away from what'sNOT working for you and allows you to bring your attention back to what IS working for you.
Esther Hicks' book, "The Vortex" Where the Law of Attraction Assembles All Cooperative Relationships" talks about the power of focusing your attention where you want the energy to flow.
6. You Are in the Right Place at the Right Time
Letting go allows you to discover that you're in the right place, at the right time and that what you want to change will come when it's right. Changes can't be forced. If they are, you may find yourself making some of your biggest mistakes and regrets.
Yes, it’s all part of the lesson but the lesson itself could be to NOTforce the change. When the time is right, the time is right. So, Let. It. Go. Surrender.
David R. Hawkins's book, "Letting Go: The Pathway to Surrender" shows you how to let go and surrender in all areas of your life so that you may find more self-awareness and enlightenment.
Final Thoughts
Next time you find yourself feeling stuck, choose to let go and release IT. Remember, this is just a tiny blip on your journey, a million-mile long journey. And, while it may seem like a mountain to climb at the time when you let go, it just becomes a small piece of gravel that can be easily climbed over - once the time is right.
This post was originally published on April 9th, 2021, and updated on July 13th, 2022.
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